Posted by: mlondon84 | August 6, 2008

About me – Things I Hate

So we have been going through things I like, but I wanted to go through the things I hate also. (Or dislike with a passion as my wife likes me to say) If you have spent any amount of time around me, you would know the things I am not very fond of. The list is short, but I make it clear what items are on that list.

So today I am going to talk about the first item on the list .

So today’s little nugget of glory about me is:

“What is Dad’s least favorite food/thing in the whole world?”

Tomatoes…….A word that brings shivers down my spine just when I think about it. It is the most disgusting thing on this earth, other than spiders, but that is another post. Anything that massacreds around as a fruit, but is really a vegetable is something we need to be afraid of. I mean honestly, have you ever looked inside a tomato? It looks like the inside of road kill. It is gross! I have said for many years that if I were to wake up surrounded by Tomatoes, I would know where I am…….(*Cough* Hades *Cough*). 

You say Tomato, I say Tomatoe

You say Tomato, I say Tomatoe

Another key point I have to show why tomatoes are bad is the spelling. I mean seriously, can anyone actually spell the word right? We all know that are past VP of this great nation could not even spell it right, so that shows that we should hate it. Anything that the English-speaking world can’t spell without thinking about it should be put on the Axis of Evil.

The legendary amount of hatred I have towards tomatoes is well known, and to prove that point I have a story that shows my dislike for tomatoes. When Perla and I were still dating we were at a restaurant with her family. They jokingly asked me to eat a tomato. The reasoning for this horrific request? If I loved Perla with all my heart than I would do anything for her….including eating a wretched tomato. I hesitantly agreed to take a bite of it, only to find myself running to the bathroom gagging.

Everyone got a good laugh, but it made me realize something. I would take a bullet for Perla, but there was something I just would not do to prove my love to my wife, and your future Mommy. The major thing that I would not do is save your Mom from a killer tomato, if Perla was attacked my a giant tomato I would have to pass on saving her. It is hard for me to say that, but I have to draw the line. The easiest way to defeat me is to start throwing tomatoes at me. It is my kryptonite; it disables me. The power of the tomato is strong and I am too weak to fight it.

So now that you know my weakness, you can help save your Dad (and Mom) from the future threat of tomatoes attacking our family.




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